19.4.13

portal.


















Well it would seem that today is some kind of turning point with regard to me drugz: physically I feel almost normal, which is suddenly amazing. Even yesterday I had the wobbly hungry zombie legs and general half-coordination, but today, all day even, I felt pretty much like myself. And the crazy munchies have subsided. So six nights for the 15mg side effects to become basically manageable. And sleepytime is, yes, decreasing gradually, but still lasting almost 6 hours a night. All pretty good.

Mentally: hasn't been bad, I might be 9% more relaxed. Which isn't nearly enough, but I'm looking forward to what happens now that I feel physically better. Still reversing some words when speaking and typing, it's a bit like I see whole sentences at once with all words having equal value, or then sometimes I just switch beginnings of words, even when typing. But it all is only occasional and seems to be getting better, and that kind of shit happened the first/previous time I took benzodiazepines too, so I blame them. I can't/won't take them all the time anyway, so it seems pretty temporary/harmless.

+++.

Last night was my last gig for the forseeable future, it was a good one, but I'm also glad to be done with everything.

(Bottom photo: Eric de Clercq)






















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