order up.

Ah, solo dining (well, you can see my non-human expediter Mačka above checking the integrity of this plating). Normally this would be an opportunity for me to cook something that my roommate does not thoroughly enjoy. Something with lots of trassi or other stinky fermented fish products, most likely.

Last night, though, I was "wearing the double headphones" and didn't really want to stop for an extended cooking session. What? Oh, you caught that bit of new lingo I'm using? Yeah: "double headphones" refers to my new "home studio" recording technique (my "home studio" is my "laptop"). Due to an as-yet-undiagnosed technical problem, I currently have to wear two sets of headphones simultaneously in order to monitor both myself and the tracks I've already recorded. I'm sure I don't have to tell you that this look is potent, sexually explosive, something like 180-proof aphrodisiac, bitches be climbing up to my third-story window just to sneak a peek at the double headphones. And I just slowly turn my incredibly cumbersome headphone helmet in their general direction and flash them with the "what up, bitches" eyebrow raise. And they, eyes fluttering, unable to control their limbs, slowly release their grip on the windowsill and plummet, moist and trembling, to the littered street below.


Since I couldn't stop DHing, I just wanted to open a jar of something and throw its contents and several other barely considered items in a wok together, so I did the following. Thing is, unless your mango chutney is 1) homemade and 2) Surinamese, your results won't taste anything like mine. Not that I made mango chutney or anything, but it's another Surinam Food Amsterdam product from the toko downstairs (SFA, besides being totally unGoogleable, are the makers of Surinaamse Sambal X-Hot, the only combination condiment/tooth pain reliever on the market) , and you can tell just by looking at the color of the brick-red mango pieces in the sauce that it's barely related to those Major Grey or Patak characters. Plus, it gots habanero in there.


tjatnie kip met kouseband

1/2 cup Surinamese mango chutney
3 tbsp walnut oil
2 chicken breasts, cut into 2cm cubes if you are so inclined
1/2 cup chicken broth
300gr haricot verts or Chinese long beans, cut
2 tbsp ketjap manis
1 tbsp butter

I combined the walnut oil and chutney and marinated the chicken in it for a couple of hours. Then I got a wok hot enough to de-flesh this Lil' K-Pon if he wasn't careful and dumped the chicken in there to brown it. After a few minutes I added the chicken broth and put a lid on the wok for 1o minutes or so. When the chicken was cooked I tossed the haricots verts in there and put the lid back on to steam everything for 5 minutes or so, then added the ketjap manis and butter and tucked in. Served 1 last night and should do another one today.


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