the egg of mantumbi.

I was in the grocery store this morning when I noticed that the man in line in front of me had a live raven perched on his arm. As if the checkout lines at the Dirk van den Broek aren't dodgy enough. My first thought was, "how did this happen?" My second thought was, "Wow, are those...feathers in his hair?" The man had woven raven feathers into his dreadlock/braid hair arrangement, or maybe they just ended up there, leftover from a strong draft or intimate moment. He was buying tea and sardines, I'm guessing the tea was for him.


For me this morning there was an organic boneless pork chop. I think it was a chop. It was boneless for sure. I hacked together a lazy fig/tamarind "chutney" to go with it: fig preserves, tamarind concentrate, ginger, cumin, a splash of coconut vinegar just out of curiosity...simmer the whole mess for 10 minutes or so. Tasty.


The other night at the LYSN gig Hilary told me about The Mighty Boosh (official site), he couldn't believe I didn't know about it. I checked it out when I got home, and I can't believe I didn't know about it. I'm not a fan of tons of British comedy, but the stuff I do like is some of the most completely fucked (and funniest) humor I've ever seen. Chris Morris' Jam really just had me sitting there with my mouth open for about 2 weeks afterwards.

A transcript of a Boosh episode doesn't do us too much good because you miss Noel Fielding's (and his brother Michael's) voices, which sound exactly like Hilary, but here's one anyway. The synopsis of the ELECTRO episode is as follows: They work at the zoo. Vince is asked to join a pop band. Howard panics. Vince gets Howard involved. Together they attempt to break into the world of electro pop. But Howard has made a deal with the Spirit of Jazz many years before and it isn't long before his past comes back to haunt him.


Scene 1.
Zoo. Exterior, near the hutches.

[Howard is listening to jazz blaring out of a small stereo, dancing twitchily. He is in a jazz trance. Vince enters, carrying a bucket.]

Vince: Hey, Howard. Howard. Oi, small eyes. [waves hand in front of Howard’s face, to no avail. Then to camera, sighing] He’s in a trance. A jazz trance. Every day he does this. It’s a pretty delicate procedure, getting him out. [slaps Howard across the face and jazz music stops]
Howard: [yelping in protest] Don’t do that. Ever.
Vince: What? Why?
Howard: Never do that to a man when he’s in a jazz trance.
Vince: Why?
Howard: I could have a heart attack! Eh? It’s like sleepwalking. I was deep in the juju then. I was chasin' the trane!
Vince: So what? Why don’t you try doing some work?
Howard: I’m gonna get round to my work, aren't I?
Vince: Are you.
Howard: This is my early morning procedure. Listen to my jazz, get myself juiced up, then go about my business.
Vince: No you don’t, you put your jazz on, go into a trance, ten past six, come out of the trance, go to the pub. That’s your day.
Howard: Have you got anything you could be doing, perhaps? Distributing seeds amongst the hoofed mammals maybe?
Vince: Yeah! I’m onto it…
Howard: Well how about it?
Vince: …because I started my day with this. [pulls a cassette tape from his pocket] Check this out. [Put tape in player and new-wave electro music comes out. Vince starts dancing semi-robotically.]
Howard: That is just making me feel physically sick. [Takes tape out of player and tosses it on the ground] What is that gloomy racket?
Vince: [In absolute disbelief] That’s the Human League!
Howard: That is electro nonsense.
Vince: They’re electro pioneers! They invented music!
Howard: Invented music?
Vince: Yeah!
Howard: What happened before them, then?
Vince: It was just tuning up before then.
Howard: Are you aware of the music known as jazz? Are you aware of jazz music? The movement of jazz?
Vince: [sighs] What do you keep going on about jazz for?
Howard: Because it’s the most important artform in the 20th Century. Hmm?
Vince: No one listens to jazz. Science teachers and the mentally ill, that’s all jazz is for.
Howard: You better take that back. You electro ponce.
Vince: Or what?
Howard: You better just take it back, that’s all.
Vince: I won’t be taking that back, I’ll be leaving it out there for all to see.
Howard: Drink it back up.
Vince: No. I hate jazz.
Howard: You hate jazz?
Vince: Yeah.
Howard: You fear jazz. Eh? [Vince looks sheepish] Ahh.
Vince: Shut your mouth.
Howard: Yeeeah. You fear jazz, don’t you?
Vince: No I don’t.
Howard: You fear the lack of rules.
Vince: No.
Howard: The lack of boundaries. Oooh! It’s a fence! No, it’s soft! Ahhhh! What’s happening? The shapes! The chaos! Eh? Has to be simple nursery rhymes for you, doesn’t it?
Vince: [distressed] Stop it. Stop the evil.
Howard: Simple little [to child’s schoolyard tune] “dee dee-dee de dee dee”.
Vince: Shut your mouth Howard.
Howard: The melody gets abstract. You mess your trousers. You run to your mummy.
Vince: Shut your mouth.
Howard: Eh? De-bop. Scoo-bup.
Vince: Don’t start scatting.
Howard: Bee-bup.
Vince: We don’t need scat at this point.
Howard: Dee be-de-bup-bow.
Vince: You better stop scatting.
Howard: Scoo-bup a doo-bup a deee KA!
Vince: This is your final warning.
Howard: Squiddily bee-bee, a scup –

[Vince throws the seedy contents of the bucket into Howard’s face and runs off]


And so forth. Here's the YouTube of that scene. It's all on YouTube actually, go see it. And then buy the DVD, like I did.

The Hitcher. Series 1, Episode 8. One of my favorites. Great slap bass discussion in the Animal Transit Vehicle, and then a typically amazing cartoon at 8 minutes in. These are always exceptional, with genius narration from Vince. Then the awesome slap bass segment at the end.
Charlie. Series 1, Episode 6. Starts out a bit slow, but another amazing cartoon appears at 3 minutes or so. But in general not the greatest of episodes.
Jungle. Series 1, Episode 5. Lame beginning, but gets better fast.
The Priest and the Beast. Series 2, Episode 2. This is the episode that Hilary was referring to when he asked me if I'd seen The Mighty Boosh. Vincent and Howard are looking for a new sound for their band. The first 5 minutes are great, but I think it kind of disappears up its own Cheech & Chong-flavored ass for most of it, but then redeems itself in the last third.


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