I just listened to someone outside on the street try to open a bag of Doritos for roughly 90 seconds. I looked outside after the first 30 seconds because the clarity of the sound itself was so incongruous, like why can I hear that like it's happening inside my room and yet I do not have a bag of Doritos. Weirdly, thankfully, I could not hear the triumphant crunches afterwards, but also, if it took you that long to open a bag of Doritos, wouldn't you just Tasmanian Devil fistfuls of that shit for the world to hear.
The Year in Delicious: Top 10 Bites of 2025
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